Hardships are part of the human experience. You can substitute hardship for adversity, tragedy, loss, disadvantage, disability, or any other difficult circumstance. Some think that the bad things are payment for the good things that happen. Others believe all misfortunes are lessons in disguise. However you view tragedy, misfortunes, or bad days, one thing is certain—we all have them.

For us, it was a tornado.

There is no tried-and-true formula to ease hardship or process grief and difficult feelings. We all experience these things in a unique way. If you’re a small business owner, it can be difficult to navigate hardship while also managing your business. But these steps are a great place to start.

• Find—and keep—your sense of humor. This is essential. Sometimes joy or levity seems unbearable, but laughter is medicine. Don’t forget to take your medicine!

• Be mentally/emotionally aware. All of your feelings are valid, but watch your inner monologue and keep it in check. Don’t forget self-care is important. And reach out for trusted and professional help when you need it.

• Take stock of all you’ve been through before. I’d bet you’re no stranger to tough times. We’ve all had hardships from time to time. Use what you’ve learned in the past.

• A change in perspective. This. Takes. Work. What can you learn from this hardship/adversity/situation? Remember that not all lessons are fun, but self-reflection is essential to growth and worth your time and dedication.

• Make peace with the situation. This takes time. No one can tell you exactly how to make peace with your situation. Meditate, pray, read, grieve, let go, and heal. Connect with your community and take the time to heal, recover, and grow. Each situation will be different, but you can and will heal.

• Embrace the new chance for opportunity. It’s there—you may not see it yet—but it’s there!

• You’re not alone. Difficulty can make us all feel isolated—or even make it difficult to have reasons to get out of bed in the morning. Tell someone. Don’t go through this alone. You aren’t alone, and others can bear your burden with you.

• Keep your purpose clear. What was your driving force before these new circumstances? Reinvest or reinvent. Keep your purpose clear, and it will fuel your journey as well as guide you.

The Dream Becomes Reality

Every new enterprise has ups and downs. There are normal obstacles that most of us go through when starting a business or beginning a new profession.

For our family, we bought our farm in the fall of 2017. Things were looking up, and I felt like a superhero, crushing goals around the farm! The gratitude I felt was intense. I remember thinking, “I get to walk under these pines every day for the rest of my life!” And I was so grateful. Starting our flower farm was a dream come true!

The Dream Becomes a Nightmare

Somewhere along your journey, there is the potential for misfortune. However adversity has challenged your life, you aren’t alone.

Writing about and taking photos of the destruction was one of the most helpful ways I dealt with my grief. If you’re experiencing a hardship, remember to stay connected with your family and friends.

Late February 2018, six months after moving to our farm, our homestead was destroyed by a tornado. The infrastructure, plants, trees, buildings, and more, were gone.

Finding Gratitude in Adversity

When you’re struggling to face the day in front of you, acknowledge that you’re still here. And that is important.It’s hard to see the light let alone be the light when times are dark, but it works. It helps. It heals you.

Remind yourself: Gratitude is essential to overcome any hardship. You always have something to be grateful for; you just have to remind yourself. Find gratitude and hold on to it.

“We’re alive” was my mantra for a solid year. And it got me through the next few years as well. We survived. Our animals all survived. We’re here. I can do this. I had to repeat these truths to myself over and over.

Feeling difficult feelings is part of the process. I’ve cried amongst the rubble more times than I care to admit. Acknowledge the feelings, feel them, and process them at your own pace.

Holding On

Overcoming adversity is uncertain. Holding on to your purpose and your gratitude is critical.

I held on to every small chunk of hope I could find. That first spring, I grew two small gardens for myself, “in spite of the tornado.”

Holding on to that silly make-believe vengeance against an element of nature actually kept me sane! I laughed, I focused on the work, and I was grateful.

Hold on to your sense of humor, your gratitude, and your purpose. They will keep you grounded in reality and help you move forward.

Never Giving Up

Never give up. You’re worth it. It’s worth it! Keep at it! I know it’s been a long journey, but you’ve come much too far to give up. No matter what that journey is or if you’re on day one or day 3000, don’t give up.

You may need to change, reinvent, and start all over a couple of times, but it’s worth it. And you can do it. Our lives are a great adventure, and we must learn and grow to keep up with that journey!

I’d be lying if I said I never wanted to give in—that the sheer weight of the destruction and loss hadn’t crushed us. Eventually, I always got up. Got back to work. And you should too. Don’t give up. Regroup and push forward when you’re ready.

You’ve got this, no matter what.